it’d be cool to speak like 20 different languages & keep it a secret from everyone & then during a time of crisis, u could speak some fluent russian to some russian guy holding a gun to your head & all your friends will be like daaamn
when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that i can’t wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that’s better and involves me
when you’re typing “good morning” and you accidentally type “hood morning”
SO THIS GUY IN MY ENGLISH IS DOING A PROJECT FOR BIO WHERE HE GETS A DUCKLING TO IMPRINT ON HIM SO HE JUST CARRIES IT AROUND WITH HIM TO ALL OF HIS CLASSES AND I SWEAR THIS DUCK IS THE MOST WELL BEHAVED FUCKING POULTRY IVE EVER SEEN IT JUST SITS ON HIS DESK QUIETLY AND SOMETIMES HE PUTS IT IN HIS POCKET AND IT JUST SLEEPS LIKE WOW YOU GO DUCKY
most well behaved poultry
Remember that episode of Bananas in Pyjamas where they had to walk around naked because someone stole their pyjamas off the clothesline?
So then they decided to make clothes out of their curtains
And that bitch Lulu laughed at them?
lulu was the rudest bitch i swear
there are teenagers who have unprotected sex but have a case for their iphone
just let that sink in
